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Photo by Normal Bob

God bless this stranger. At the Halloween party we were at he came over and entertained us with so many fuckin' great stories.

That lady on his shirt is his dead wife, and he's tryin' to profit off of her face because she fucked around on him when they were together because nobody wants to be with a fuckin' junky.

All that and never once did he explain what the fuck happened to his goddamn forehead!


Photo by Normal Bob
You know what? Screw all you dumb-fucks out there with your 50 hour work weeks, full coverage health insurance, stock options and paid holidays. That money basket is a Horn of Plenty when it's surrounded by wiggle-wobble-dolls, Casio beats and some old dude who never even had to learn a word of English to get your dollar.

Photo by Normal Bob

Imagine if most of your daily schedule revolved around the possibility of being beamed up into the mother ship and taken away to a far off galaxy so you could be with your own kind for the rest of infinity. Then imagine if along with all that you still had to figure out what you were gonna wear that day.

Imagine that.



Photo by Normal Bob
My god. What sort of creatures are we breeding? Don't we have some responsibility to spare lesser life-forms the cruel and humiliating fate of knowing the realities of being a ladybug-pooch?

 


Photo by Venessa Nina

God I love Insectivora. From the top of here dreaded, tattooed head to the tips of her dreaded, tattooed toes. Never in your lifetime will you see a tattoed beauty like that of this insect-eating Coney Island oddity from "Parts Unknown."

But alas, she doesn't even know I'm alive.


Photo by Normal Bob
It all sounded so glamorous in the classifieds when it said: "Actors wanted... work in the entertainment industry... fresh air... friendly people... and big Hollywood roles!"
I took this picture on the train thinkin' there was a chance he was just a guy fallin' asleep on his way home from work or something.


Photos by Normal Bob
But this is totally a junky. And you can be sure it's junk when no matter how far they sink they never... ever... really... totally... fall... over.

Photo by Normal Bob

So I make the decision to go down and try to get on the Howard Stern show to promote the site. I was so hopeful, right up until this asswipe showed up and reminded me just how low I'd sunk.

He's a "Human Fire Alarm." Get it? And I stood there for 4 hours while he pointed that thingy at everyone who walked by, and at me everytime he asked "Do you think they'll let us up?"


Photo by some stranger
Um, so yeah. What really can I say?

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Insults written strangely are describing strangers I have to see every single day and I don't want them to be sure what it means either.
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