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NY, I Love You

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Photo by Normal Bob
You first see this lady and you're like, "Whoa! What the fuck is going on here?"

So you take the picture, upload it to your computer, and then you see what's really goin' on within that aqua coziness, and you're like, "Oh no! Camel-toe! AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!"

Photo by Normal Bob
I swear to God, I thought that these two were together, and then when they crossed the street they separated!

Photo by Normal Bob
Two Strangers in one! How often does that happen?

Not very. That's all I gotta say.

Photo by Normal Bob
What is this? Who would wear this? Am I missing something? Is there some cult I should be made aware of, or a club I'll never be made a member of?

Wait, it's pulling me in. I can't get away from it! Let go of me! Leave me alone! Where did you come from?!? Why are you whispering those things to me?!?! YOU'RE THE CRAZY ONE, NOT ME! STOP TRYING TO STEAL MY REFLECTION!!!!


Photo by Normal Bob
And then this Guido sits next to me on the train with a big smile on his face, opens up his bag, and starts tuning a flute.

Photo by Normal Bob
He didn't play any songs, he just played individual notes, as if to say "Looket me, I'm just a big cuddly teddy bear and I want everyone to know that I played the flute in high school band, and that's all the excuse I need to make a spectacle of myself on the subway! Please love me!"

Photo by Normal Bob

Okay, so when you're trying to pick up on a couple girls and they both refuse to make any eye contact with you the entire time you're talking to them, that's a good sign they're not feelin' the outfit.


Photo by Normal Bob

Then if one of them starts talking on her cell phone and the other one opts to stare into the sun rather than listen to your explanation of why a magic goblin is less powerful than an enchanted wizard, you can pretty much consider yourself a gargantuan annoyance.


Photo by Normal Bob
I love watching teenage guys with their parents who are trying to act like they're not with their parents, especially when the teenager thinks he can be like Scarface walking around with his parents trying to act like he isn't with his parents.


Photo by Normal Bob
In fact, fuck all that! I love watching it ANYTIME ANYONE wants to advertise their similitude with Scarface by toting around cheesy, overpriced Times Square souvenirs. I don't know why.. It just makes me smile.

Photo by Normal Bob
You're just askin' for it walkin' around the streets of New York City in this jacket.

If you don't think her day's gonna end with a bullet in her spinal column then you don't know shit about New York, or fashion for that matter.


Photo by Normal Bob
Not even the majestic golden rays of God's sunbeams could penetrate the globiness of this man's ultimate helmet hair!

Photo by Normal Bob
And what's a page of Amazing Strangers without some junkie stuck in a nod tryin' to light a cigarette in this position for 7 and a half minutes?

It's just not as much fun, that's what!

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Insults written strangely are describing strangers I have to see every single day and I don't want them to be sure what it means either.
NORMAL BOB SMITH DESIGN NEW YORK


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