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Gravers




Photo by Venessa Nina
So what exactly is a Graver?

A Graver is a cross between a goth and a raver. It's all the accessories, giant pants and anime that make up a raver, combined with the dark, mysterious gloom of a goth! But it's also so much more than that.

Being a Graver also includes bits of punk and hip hop, metal, industrial, gangsta, hippy, gamer, and yes, even jock!

In fact the only thing that Graver does not include is hipster. The hipster is the natural enemy of the Graver. There is no Graver in Hipster, and no Hipster in Graver. They are polar opposites. If ever the two meet, one appears invisible to the other.

Photo by Venessa Nina
Are Gravers part Vampire?

Yes! Gravers are very much part Vampire. This includes (but is not limited to) vampire fangs, fake snake eye contacts, long flowing capes, 'Lost Boys' type sunglasses, and blond roots.


Photo by Normal Bob
Can a Graver be beautiful?

Rarely, if ever, is a Graver beautiful.

Sometimes, accidentally, an attractive person becomes a Graver. When this happens, the attractive person loses their looks within a matter of weeks, sometimes days.

It's a gradual process, slowly becoming more doughy, an over-accumulation of Graver accessories and bad fashion advice from newly acquired Graver friends.

Photo by Normal Bob
Okay, how about inside? Can a Graver be beautiful inside?

No. Not even inside.

Photo by Noah Rider
Is there any such thing as a cool Graver?

No. Absolutely not. There will never be and has never been any such thing as a cool Graver.

Not even in its purest form has a Graver had anything that could be mistaken as "cool."
It is an improbable concept. A non-existant being.

Photo by Normal Bob
Can Gravers fall in love?

Yes, but only with other Gravers. There is no love that's ever succeeded between a Graver and anyone other than another Graver. And watch out! If you are not a Graver but fall in love with a Graver, you will more than likely become a Graver yourself. Graver is the dominant fashion statement in any mixed relationship.

Photo by Normal Bob
What does a Graver do, mostly?

Gravers do all sorts of things. Gravers play fight using fake weapons like shower curtain rods as fighting staffs, paper towel tubes as light-sabers, or nunchucks made out of duct tape and rope.

Gravers also rave dance, draw bad anime characters, play like they're secret agents or Kung Fu experts when they're not, impromptu liquid dancing, and sparring.

Photo by Noah Rider
Do Gravers know they're Gravers?

Oddly, no. If you were to ask a Graver if he/she considers him or herself a Graver they would deny all and any affiliation to the name.

Most Gravers will refer to themselves as goth, or hippy, or punk rock, or even say that they don't like to be stereotyped. But of course it doesn't matter what a Graver thinks. Their identity has nothing to do with what they think. Whether or not they are a Graver isn't up to them. Their fate has already been determined.

Photo by Normal Bob
What sort of accessories does a Graver wear?

The list of accessories for a Graver is limitless. It can include anything from doo-rags, studded belts, chokers, claw rings and handcuffs, all the way to Phantom of the Opera masks, canes, fanny packs, fake hair extensions, goggles, bandanas, evil stuffed animals and excessive body piercings.

Really it can be anything! The whole point of being a Graver is an excuse for all the accessories!

Photo by Normal Bob
What religion are Gravers?

Oddly, most gravers would describe themselves as very spiritual. Many of them still believe in god and even worship Jesus Christ!

To a Graver this is considered to be an intriguing and ironic twist to their clearly "evil" exterior. Another character building accessory.

Photo by Venessa Nina

Who were the very first Gravers?

The most famous Gravers of them all were the Trenchcoat Mafia. They are also heavily inspired by such things as The Matrix, Insane Clown Posse and The Crow.


Photo by Normal Bob
What does a Graver grow up to become?

As everybody knows, when a Graver grows up, or "graduates," they become a junky. Sorry.




Subject: graver

Bob.
This is Arez. I am the graver in the central photograph on the header of the graver page of your website.. I have a black sleeveless kung~fu shirt and a black canvas skirt with leather straps and buckles on it, and I have red, white and blue wool hair extentions. well at anyrate.

I want to tell you that you were in atleast one case incorrect about what gravers do when they grow up or "graduate" your site says they all become junkies?.. well i am not a junkie, I never have been and never will be.. hell the worst drug i've ever taken was smoke pot one time when i was 16. and i also have no desire or intention to indulge in illicit substances. so not all gravers become junkies. just thought you should know.

regards,
ArEz

Subject: Re: graver

Oh, you just wait. You're not at the finish line yet!

Bob


 


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