For a while now I've been
talking about Gravers and Hipsters.
I've been talking about how the Graver is the exact opposite of a Hipster. I even went so far as to say, "The hipster is the
natural enemy of the Graver. There is no Graver in Hipster, and no
Hipster in Graver. They are polar opposites. If ever the two meet, one
appears invisible to the other."
Well, wouldn't you know that just a couple months after making this
statement, the two became one. That's right. And the result of this
conjunction has formed what can now be referred to as...
Photo by Normal Bob
So what's a Scenester?
A Scenester is the melding of the
Hipster and the Graver. Like Gravers a Scenester has its own collection
of accessories.
A Scenester's accessories include,
and ARE limited to: sunglasses, studded belts, key chains, tight jeans
and tight shirts, iPods, bookbags, tight hoodies, black handkerchief in
back pocket, and a fascination with robots, pirates and ninjas.
Photo by Normal Bob
Like the Gravers, the Scenesters also play fight! They
karate-chop each other, wrestle, fake punch and kick each
other! Scenesters play fight without make-believe weapons, while
Gravers playfight with make-believe weapons.
Video by Normal Bob
Scenesters also have an additional feature which is
referred to as "iPod Dancing" (the act of dancing alone to one's iPod) or Hardcore dance. Click above for lessons in Hardcore dancing.
Photo by Normal Bob
A Scenester cares more about his
hair and clothes than a Graver. A Scenester will spend hours on hair;
combing, primping, flattening and styling, while a Graver will rock a
do-rag with a ponytail.
Photo by Normal Bob
Photo by Normal Bob
Like the Gravers the Scenesters
hang only with their own kind, and any outsider who finds themselves
within the Scenester clique risks being transformed into one of them,
absorbed into the Scenester mass. The Scenester (like the Graver) is
the dominant fashion statement in a relationship.
Photo by Normal Bob
Unlike the Graver, the Scenester
wears tight pants, tight hoodies and tight shirts.
Like the Graver, the Scenester
includes bits of punk, gangsta (they sag the tight jeans & talk
like thugs), jock, goth, and even a smidgin of vampire.
None of this fairs well for the
Hipsters. Being co-opted by teens usually spells disaster for trends
such as these.
Photo by Normal Bob
But one of the most
fascinating aspects of this whole entire Scenester invasion is that the
Gravers are nowhere to be found! No joke. One look around
Union Square, and what used to be everywhere, is now nowhere! Sure,
there are some Scenesters who were once Gravers, but what was once
hordes of Gravers occupying the park has completely disappeared! There
isn't a Graver to be found! So I ask you: Where have the Gravers gone?
