Fan + ? = :)

It's always interesting when a third party gets involved.

Well the local radio station here in Wellington, New Zealand mentioned your site - and I was online and took a look. Looking at your site - it's no wonder why you get so much fan and hatemail. I find your retorts not only razor-witted but incredibly intelligent. Your grammar and wordmanship is truly fantastic. I am in awe.

I think you have a fantastic sense of humour, and it shines even more in your replies to the Jesusfreaks who show just how simple and narrow-minded they are. I'm not against religion nor am I for it. It does, however annoy me immensely when I see Bible Bashers in our city streets yelling their propaganda and I think how funny it would be if someone would set up down the street from the Jesusfreak and propagate the benefits for turning away from religion. So in essence, your web site does just that.

Ive included a pic of me and Jerry (met him in New Orleans 2am one Tuesday morning), Jerry is cool and the Jesusfreaks hate him to. But he is so good at "taking the piss*".

Great job! Thanks for fulfilling a dream. Your new fan

Grace
* Kiwi and Aussie slang for "making fun"


My mom always told me not to discuss two things: politics and religion, but your website does justice to many brave people who aren't scared of denying the myth most of us grew up with: God. Sure, the bible's a great novel, if you like fantasy/sci-fi shit, but otherwise, it is utterly unbelievable and I refuse to acknowledge such dung as the truth. I'm not atheist, because I don't hate the idea of "God." I mean, come on, he's a good ole' boy in a few ways, and a complete asshole most of the time. My parents both believe, but don't know the degree to which I *don't*...Awesome website. Hilarious and truthful. Potent and passionate.

It made me see the light. I love the way you don't give a hoot about people's bad comments or opinions damning your site and you to the fiery pits of Hell.

This site is almost like a great big gay-pride parade. Seems like it will never be accepted that some people (like you) are not slaves to society. Isn't is cool--if there really is a Hell--that every hot lesbian will be there to greet you, possibly nude? Golly gee, I can't wait.

Lyndsie

P.S. I think you should have a PriestDressUp game, or perhaps a Mother Theresa Dress Up Game.

 


Hola, Senior Bob, Who knew, the first time I found your little Jesus Dress Up site, that here I'd be, months later, madly clicking my mouse button first thing every morning, hoping every day to see another hate mail page, more Special People, or even another Super Chick. I was hopelessly hooked once I read "God Ate My balls" Being an athiest almost to the point of anger, your site reflects pretty much everything I believe, but am not eloquent enuff to put into words.

So, as sort of a slap in the face to religion, I went to the Universal Life Church website, took a couple of minutes to fill out the form, and 5 minutes later, I was a certified minister! You should do it too Bob, if you haven't already.

I encourage EVERY godless heathen to do the same. Here's the link: www.ulc.org Oddly, you'd think my folks would be beaming with pride. What proud, god-fearing mom & dad wouldn't be happy to see their son become a man of the cloth?

But NOOOO.... MY parents are appalled, call me a sham, say I'm mocking religion. Some people have no sense of humor. Maybe if perform a gay wedding, they'll accept me... Wanna link me? I'd consider it an honor.

 

Hey bob, love the site, you have brought much amusement to me during my sad down time of poopyness here in chicagoland, which sucks donkey balls lately I found much amusement in the hate letter contest.... yes quite.

so hey for the revenge thingy you got making on why not have greek guys fuck your ass or something all greasy and greek like? i dunno... i gots to go now feed my salivacious puppy named annihilator... but seriously great ite i dig it... and look forward to seeing more whenver!

Thoth Exide
exidethoth@hotmail.com

Following are some emails that included third party interaction.

I recently took a vacation with my family and on the flight home from New York, I ended up sitting next to a guy from Guatamala. We started talking about music, politics, and eventually, religion. He was talking about how low Americans hold religion in comparison to Guatamalans, I agreed and cited NormalBobSmith.com... he then started talking about how hillarious he thought your hatemail and other features are! We talked for the remainder of the flight about how awsome your page is! I just wanted to tell you that you now officially have an international following.

Keep up the awsome work,
Bob!

Seth Kaplan
Albuquerque, NM


This next letter started as a fine piece of fan mail and ended in tragedy!

Hey, remember, no matter what people say, this site does, and will always rule. Anyone who accepts a "god," as they call it, had it forced on them as a child, making them a conformist asshole. Now, who wants to be a conformist? Ask any of these Christian goody-goodys if they think for themselves. Hell, their brains will probably short-circuit with the introduction of the concept.

And one major flaw in their belief of "God": if "he looooves us soooo much," then why did he create the Black Death (and other such diseases)? Now that I think about it, why did he create disease at all?

Some "loving god." That's like having a parent that beats the shit out of you every night without fail, and then you turning around and saying that the parent is so great, and he/she loves you soooo much. It just doesn't work, plain and simple.

And another thing, maintenance. For example: let's say you bought a $350,000 car. With that kind of an object, you've got to tune the carburetor, put gas in it; hell, if you don't drive it, you've got to at least wipe the damned thing off every once in a while! Has "God" wiped us down with his cosmic rag yet? Hell no, he hasn't. Shows how much he cares.

All you Christian pussies, if you don't like this website, DON'T ACCESS THE DAMN THING! It's not that hard! It's called LOGIC, people. Oh, wait, I forgot... Christians don't know what that is. Well, in that case, go ahead, come on to the site. There's nothing funnier than seeing a Christian yell at people about something that doesn't exist (and they know it, too). To all the people that try to use the Bible as their source of justification, it's called EVIDENCE. Now, let's all say it together now...

The United States' entire society relies on this thing called evidence. It means you need to have proof of what you claim for it to have any value. So it says that "God" just pointed his finger, and poof, and created the world in six days. Can you prove it? No? Then shut the hell up! Okay, so let's pretend that what the bible says IS true. If I write the words "I am God" in it, why is that NOT true? Can you prove it? If you can, bring it on. I'd be glad to shoot you down.

If you want to try to justify any Christian beliefs, I'd be glad to ignore them. You can send them to kings105@aol.com where they have a chance (albeit a slim one) of being read. And yes, I know the address I sent this email in with is different, but my AOL will be offline until the day after tomorrow. After all, it's AOL...

And Bob, if there is a such thing as hell, I'll help you take it over when I get there.

Adam


This reply that I sent unfortunatly was directed to the wrong address.

Hey Adam, is there a picture of yourself or something that I can put with your email on my pages? Your letter is cool and I'd like to put it up (include your email address?).

Bob

Adam is no longer at this e-mail address. Do not send any further communications to the address under any circumstances. Delete the address from your records.

Adam's grandfather.......

Oops, sorry Adam. My bad.


Then there are some incidences of fans turning on fans.
Recently I posted a series of letters from various gay fans. One of the letters prompted another third party intervention.

The letter:

A friend sent me the link to your web site. He is straight and I am gay but we are both non-theists. I was reading some of the hate mail that you've received and it sounds very familiar to me. To you it may be sport to make fun of these ignorant zealots, but to me, their hate is very serious. They consider me an emissary of satan because I am gay. But you know what, I have never met a satan worshipping gay guy. Isn't satanism just an extreme sect of christianity? I follow an eastern philosophy of Taoism. Anyways, back to the point I was trying to make: Militant fundamentalism is on the rise in this country. All religious fundamentalism is inherently intolerant and cannot accept diversity. It has to destroy what it cannot convert. Take it from me a gay guy, these people are very dangerous and powerful. Look at how they have treated my community. I don't really know what to say to you about them. All I know is they are sooooo fucking powerful. I don't mean the morons who write to you but the ones who control them. You are in my thoughts. I know that you are sick of their crap too... Take care.

Steven Luther

Bob--- This is a response to Steven Luther's letter. It's long, but I HAD to write it! You probably won't agree with my opinions, but whatever.

April

Alright, Steven, I have to object.

First, itıs foolish to assume that zealots who oppose homosexuality are ignorant. I personally am sick of hearing about intolerance or personal values being products of ignorance. This is underestimation of the intellects of people -- realize that there are throngs of intelligent, introspective people who have come to their conclusions after much research and thought. Not everyone who opposes your mode of life hates you or has been brainwashed into thinking youıre a Satanist. Christiansı opinions may not be right in your eyes, just as your opinions may not be right in theirs.

I hate the opinion that anyone who isnıt all-accepting is dumb, and anyone who is ultra-liberal is smart. There are plenty of witless religious extremists who walk alongside brilliant counterparts; likewise, there are smart and dumb so-called heathens.

I have a question for you: plenty of non-religious people hate gays. (Itıs true!) How do you explain their intolerance, if it isnıt a product of brainwashing or religious zeal (or repressed homosexuality, another favorite argument)?

Militant fundamentalism is on the rise in this country? What parallel universe do you live in? If fundamentalism were on the rise, women wouldnıt be hitting the workforce in droves, bigotry would be resulting in everyday lynching (it is true that we hear of race- or orientation-based hate crimes, but the occurrences are few and far between and virtually non-existent in comparison to the number of injuries and deaths caused by spousal abuse or other crimes we never hear about), and people would be banished for their heresy. No. In our age of public-interest groups and political-action committees, we are force-fed skewed data, guilt-based persuasion (save the fuckinı rainforest for your childrenıs children!), and blatant propaganda.

People donıt think or research for themselves, and they buy into the hype their friends spout (for example, Taoismıs cool!), living their lives assuming broad generalities about different classifications of people. So, instead of militant fundamentalism, I believe we are becoming more and more blindly liberal.

Another thing: you talk about how zealots treat YOUR community. Itıs everyoneıs community. Not yours, not mine. Ours. I dislike the double-standard to which you so vaguely allude with your phrase "MY community." Whether itıs a racial sector, or a group with common sexuality, or a sex, everyone wants it two ways: they want to be able to give the old why-canıt-we-all-unite plea while maintaining an exclusive relationship to their "community." Example? Iıve always thought the solution to racism is to encourage interracial relations.... not so easy when the"it's-a-black/Latin/fill-in-the-blank-thing" attitude still exists. Another?

Gay advocates want homosexuality to be accepted but don't want to have to accept the validity of others' views. Another? Women supposedly want equality yet run to the government for special gender-based grants. Everyone wants minority status because it's sensational to be the underdog.

As for the all-encompassing "power" of the people who control these "morons," I think you're paranoid. To my knowledge, there is no underground plan to eradicate gays (or even just to "brainwash" them) from, the universe. If anyone has information to the contrary, I'd like to know.

Call me an optimist, but I still believe in the general goodness of mankind. All I can suggest for all people -- gay, straight, bi-, into dogs, whatever -- is to represent your SELF the best you can. If you truly care about encouraging positive relations among all types of people, don't give anyone any reasons to make sweeping generalities about you or any group that shares some facet of your identity.

I think this is where I make my disclaimer so my words are at least considered: I am agnostic, anti-religion, conservative. But I couldn't care less about how someone lives his own life (including being homosexual). I believe everyone should live how they please, and no repercussions should be applicable unless someone else's rights are infringed. However, my personal credo is "Boo fuckin' hoo!" Be an adult. Deal with it. If someone doesn't like you because you're gay, who cares? Move on. Guess what? Never, ever, will everyone like or be liked by everyone. Never, ever, will everyone accept the practices or values of everyone. Don't accept a hypothesis of universal harmony, because it's not going to happen.

Let me finish by saying: Go, America! Have gay sex! Marry your racial opposite! Do drugs! Go to church! Do whatever the fuck you like. Just be decent.

April


Oh yeah, and then I got this one...

yo dude,your site rox! so your name iz bob smith iz it,kool. im jake and i think u r kool, i mean who needs god when the worlds got you and me and any one (exept gays). if u r offended by the gay part (wich you probly are not) just tell me and i'll shut up.

my email iz jakesport@hotmail.com. i have my own site, its just a simple one but its still kool.

well cya and ill be visitin' again soon!
Jake Farram

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