Fans.
The only people that matter.

You make me laugh, cry, wince and most importantly you send in your pictures.

Hello Bob

Imagine a crew of younger guys, early to late twenties (some older than forty), up late at work.... testing video games of all things. It's well into the evening. The macadam parking lot out front abandoned and rain swept, most residents of Foster City, CA sound asleep in their beds resting up before dawning the corporate face another day. In the test department, it's quiet.... a little too quiet.

From across the department floor comes a wail of crowded laughter and acclaim.... and it's all for you, Bob. You've got most of my co-workers, well the ones I find actually evolved enough to show your site to, in an absolute uproar.

Look I'll be honest. Testing games is a complete breeze of a job... but it does have its trying evenings during all-nighters. Most of the lads brave enough to agree to give an entire free evening to "Monsters Inc., The Goddamn Video Game" would have pictures of import models up, uselessly pumping up their testosterone and wondering where the agression to throw the controller came from.

On my first overnight, I pulled up your site.... HateMail pages mostly, of course. Not an hour later, everyone working with me was huddled around my computer.... laughing their stomachs out.

Word has, since then, spread like wildfire. I owe much to you, Bob and thank you graciously for your comedic genius and enlightening site. I'll never look at christianity in a negative way again.

Yours Admirably,
Brian T. Matt
Sony Playstation


Heh heh, 'ello. :)

A friend of mine suggested I come to your site, and I wasn't dissapointed. .laughed my ass off! :: ass rolls away, unnoticed and forlorn::

Although I enjoyed all of your site, your artwork really impressed me, especially your ink work! ::oozes jealousy:: You've got a lot of style packed into those lines, and I wish you nothing but success with your artwork.. I'm sure you get inane fan mail like this all the damn time, so I'll stop my blathering here. Keep up the great work!

-Slinky Avenger

i am still in awe. normalbobsmith.com is great. when i have my own job, and my good computer connected to the internet, then... maybe then i might have the time to make my own jesus bashing site.

by the way, have you ever thought of putting a sort of.... "pin the tail (or nail?) on the jesus" type game on your site? i think it could go over very well with all of the born agains in this sad, overpopulated world. someday, i want to be a special person, but i'm not sure i'm capable yet.

i am a troubled highschool kid in an overly religious high school that my mom pays $10,000 a year to keep me cooped up in.

they religion they all follow isn't really technically a religion though.... its more like... a cult... they have a leader, and they meditate, they're all vegetarians, and everyone at school has to walk around barefoot. by the younger people, i am known as daughter and/or wife of satan, a name i hold very dear... then there's the other nickname, Saint Consuelo Amy Timmy Jesus, given to me by a friend who is very aware of my antichristian ways. the faculty there hates me, because i have minions who follow me around and try to be just like me.

i'm starting a rebellious army at that tiny little private school that follows a strange cult. i'm damn proud of myself. and i'm so happy i could share jesusdressup.com with my minions... i have yet to show them normalbobsmith.com... but thankyou, my life is now enhanced knowing about your site.

about thirty years ago, some hippies decided to join a religious cult some people like to call Sant Mat... it is lead by a master from india who wears a turban. these hippies owned a small farm and a victorian house in the middle of nowhere (new hampshire). one day, thair master came to the us, and visited this farm and named it santbani ashram.

these hippies were happy, especially when the master told them to start a school that forced vegetarianism upon all of their students, and made them walk around barefoot. so it began. very small at first..... six little kids... it evolved to around 180 people... still very small. at any rate, eventually, an antichrist named amy arrived at the school, she caused a big rukkus. all the teachers hated her, all the little kids were afraid of her, and her friends loved her!!!.

Saint Consuelo Amy Timmy Jesus


Hey there Mr. Smith-

I realize this is the link for advertising opps, ventures, etc....but it was this, or hire or dressupbob...so I just went with the first available.

I have nothing new to add to your pantheon of compliments, but I still want to let you know that the site makes me laugh deeply and fully, and at times my eyes well up with tears as you take on the legions of lemmings...

those deeply indoctrinated tunnel vision xtians who cannot see beyond thier narrow and limited world views. Good for you!

I also wanted to tell you how beautiful your pencil drawings are. I love the Madonna Brando - Justify My Love and the Tom Waits sketch as well. I'm not gonna waste our time with fawning praise or overstroke your ego; you seem to have a harem of little girls who want to have your babies, be your wife, or at the very least fuck you silly :) That, and I am neither little or young, nor looking to have children or get married... alas... I do have one burning desire....I wonder what your real name is. Sure it may be Bob Smith...just given your cheeky approach to things, I couldn't help but feel otherwise...

Instead, I'll take my leave by saying your site makes me smile - and I can always use those - and your persona intrigues and delights me.

tara


Hey, this may or may not interest you but I once had a vision of putting Madonna, Waits and Crispin together in some sort of movie/comic or something.

I didn't really have any plot worked out or anything, but it did spark this little drawing back in 1992.

Normal Bob Smith

 

Dear Bob,
I love you. I know you hear this all the time and are probably sick of it, nevertheless, it's true. While dress up jesus is amusing and all, I think your true talent lies in movie reviews. I couldn't even begin to produce a whole list of movies for you to review. Every movie would be great once you got done critiquing it. I did recently see The Replacements with Keanu Reeves and it was an extra big helping of shit. Perhaps you could start there. I also have included several links for yummy stuff.


As you can see from the real fine pictures I have enclosed, I am a big spaz. Oh well. Funny story: Recently a female friend of mine quit her high paying job as a CPA, sold her house and is moving to Armenia to become a missionary! Shit! That freaked me out. What the hell? (oops, no such place but hell is such a fun word, I still like to use it.) It isn't really my place to tell her what to do with her life and that little bit of insanity seemed to make her happy. So, I just bought her a case of Armenian Chick tracks to hand out once she gets there.

I still love you, Valerie

Hello Bob,

My fiancÚ turned me onto your website and I got to admit...everytime I see a crucifix somewhere, I automatically try to think of what ridiculous outfits you might come up with next. Have you considered using Boy Scout uniforms, or a sleek ski outfit? complete with poles, helmet and all. Just curious.

Anyway, to the subject of my E-mail....the movie (for lack of a word describing another-vomitous-1980's-Fred Savage-piece-of-shit.) Don't get me wrong, loved the Wonder Years....but only because of Olivia D'Abo, man what a hottie. The movie is THE WIZARD. I suggest this to you in hopes that the human race, or even you for that matter...somehow discover a way to travel through time and go back to 1990 and stop the exec's at MCA from producing this film. To aid you in your search for information and ways to find out more about this movie (although you really have to watch it to appreciate its repugnance), I am including this link ---> Half.com: The Wizard <--- to purchase the movie if you see fit.

I am not one of the people trying to unload this crap on to others...so I receive no monetary rewards for this. I am also giving you a synopsis of the movie also located on said link.
Stars: Fred Savage, Beau Bridges, Christian Slater, Jenny Lewis
Synopsis: 13-year-old Corey Woods is like almost every other kid his age: he practically eats, sleeps, and drinks videogames. When Corey discovers that his autistic brother is an idiot savant who's a wiz with a joystick, the two runaway to Los Angeles just to participate in a $30,000 videogame championship. But before it's all over, Corey and Jimmy will have their parents, their brother and a vicious bounty hunter on their tail. Description Refusing to let his emotionally disturbed younger brother be put in an institution, Corey grabs Jimmy and the two brothers run off together. Joining forces with a resourceful girl, they discover Jimmy's uncanny knack for video games and the trio set off for the video games championship, eluding parents and a sinister bounty hunter.

C'mon Bob...if that isn't enough to help you consider putting this on your website...there's seriously something goin' wrong in your head. Not that that is a bad thing...look at Edgar Allan Poe. But, Poe had enough sense not to watch Fred Savage movies. Other movies I'd suggest... Cyclone starring Heather Thomas...mid to late-80's, and Thrashin' starring Josh Brolin...once again, mid to late 80's I believe...(look for the boom mic at the top of the screen when the "Ramp Locals" finish building their ramp.)

In closing, I would also like to ask to become a member of your Super Chicks team. Im a guy into the metal and punk rock scenes, and feel I am qualified to be a super chick. At all shows, women envy the girth of my bosom, and the smooth round features of my buttocks, and if they come to me with attitude...I put em in their place. In my defense...I'm not an asshole...but I AM a prick, and believe that if women want equal rights...there's a price to pay.

For example : If I were on a sinking ship, let men and the children go first...fuck chivalry...I wanna live! 2.) do not get mad when a guy grabs your ass while wearing something provocative...I'll bet that any woman would grab a guys ass if he were to walk down the street wearing something revealing... OK.. maybe not DO it...but they'd think about it. Those are my ideas and live by them... I know that if any woman found out I thought this...I'd die by them, but OH WELL.

Finally, I include a picture of myself for you to do whatever naughty things you do with pictures of guys who send them to you.

Keep up the good work Bob,
Renan Kuri
Los Angeles, CA

P.S. I am THE super chick...hope you realize this. ::Spastic Thumbs Up::,

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