More Fans
and some answers to their burning questions.

 

Send in your fan mail, include a picture, and if it's interesting enough, I'll post it.

Enjoy!

Duuuuuuuude, you are my favorite person. You've been my favorite person for a little over a month now. Jesus is just so much cooler when he's in a body suit. Dealing with the Jesus freaks is one of my favorite past times.

Sure, it gets a little frustrating when they talk in circles and try to prove the existence of things by those things themselves, but I like a little challenge. My challenge now is to get you to write back. I can make that even *harder* my including a picture of myself. This is what it's all about, man. Oh hey, that sucks that you were raised a Christian. My family is Jewish. They're not as bad as the Bible Penetrators, but nothing beats a hard-core Atheist. I didn't really donate my kidney to Jesus. I know a lot of people that would, though. At any rate, you have yourself a good day. Keep givin' em hell.

-becca


you are going straight to hell. but so is everyone else with the slightest sense of humor, so i guess it shouldn't be all that bad. i was having a pretty crappy evening, but thanks to you and all of the wonderful christians that contribute to your hate mail, i'm feeling a lot better. not only do i get to laugh my ass off at the delusional folks trying to steer you towards the 'righteous path' and your hilarious responses (the casper thing killed me:), i get the reassurance that i'm not the biggest head-case out there! i can't even begin to imagine the reality these people live in. seriously though, with all the prosecutions and damnations to hell bible thumpers have been dishing out since the time of their precious christ they, above anyone, should expect to get a little rousting from the rest of us 'sinners'. keep it up, you rule!

love,whitney


A friend sent me a connection to your Jesus dress up page, and I laughed until I cried. I had a rather stressful day (including searching through and elderly woman's cancer ridden intestines for a way to restore function and supply some dignity in dying) and your humor was the perfect antidote. I often feel like I am being strangled by the Bible belt (transplanted to the Midwest for the last 6 years) and it is good to know that the whole world isn't trying to be holier than thou.

Laura



Beware, clicking the following link will waste 3 minutes of your life.

lol pretty funny. checkout my site
geocities.com/
invisogothworld

george

Am I correct in saying that you don't have much of a site?

hugh? you must not like graphics or art. rofl

Send your FAN MAIL with a picture and if it's interesting enough I'll post it.

Click here for
MORE FANMAIL

Bob,

I have got one burning question. How is it that by beating and humiliating God's son did the pearly gates open for us. Did God say
"boy, though creations of mine are real hardass's! I better let them in."

In all the religious propaganda you get I was wondering if you knew how that worked?

Chuck Ferrari

Good question Chuck.

The answer isn't as simple as you might think. One common misperception of both Christians and non is that the only way that you can have everlasting life is through Jesus' sacrifice for us (John 3:16). This is a fine example of God twisting his words for a higher turn out. Eternal life is an absolute for everyone. The Christians spend theirs in Heaven while all of the others spend it in Hell. The reason for this because sin equals death. 1 sin is 1 eternity in Hell.

It is God who invented this system. He invented everything (Majestic oceans, porn, Post-it Notes, Rollerblades, etc...). He also made all of the rules. One of the most important rules that God made up (besides outlawing the porn) is that the ONLY way to get into Heaven is through the bloody, horrible killing of his son. Now, I know what you're thinking. God's worse than that dad who burned his son alive leaving him disfigured just to teach his ex-wife a lesson. Well, you're only part right. If you're the son of God, death is a minor inconvenience. A hat of thorns leaves some tangles, some spitting in your open wounds and a half conscious crucifixion out in the fresh air. Following this is a cozy infinity in Heaven where you and your Dad control the gate for every V.I.P. and their dates.

God thought of everything. Right off he established who was in charge. His son is NEVER gonna fuck with his old man's authority after that show of power and Earth's workhorses now owe God! We owe him for the self imposed "sacrifice" of his son who rose from the dead and is even going to live again! God is no S.I.D.s parent. Despite that, apparently his half-assed sacrifice is all that it takes to save our dime-a-dozen souls.

It's worded much more favoring God in his book. He never explains how to un-believe all of the reality we live day to day and how a lifetime of doing this does any good, but that's the big picture drawn up by the greatest guy in the universe.... God. Thank you for your question.

Bob


hey bob, long time fan.... kinda well i guess u are alright i wouldnt call myself a fan. anyways, you know that really kol whipped cream thingy?? well i will upload a wonderfull picture of a young lady baring it all... for your pleasure!!! i jsut want the password and maybe evan the hollywood jesus dress up!!!

c'mon. be a friend!!! i am short on money, and am saving my money to go buy some food, damned motherboards cost so much.........

anyawys, i want the password!!! i will give you a few passwords if you help me out!!! ;)

-dexter
oh yeah, your real kool
you cannot escape your destiny


The original picture was 5 times this big.

Oh come on Dexter, these pictures are a dime a dozen on the internet. I definitely can not give out the WhippedCreamBikini password.

As for the Hollywood Jesus Dress Up password... send me anything of use (Some original piece of Jesus art, an April Fool's prank, a crazy contact you had with somebody, anything!) and the password is yours. It's so simple, just put your mind to it and I'm sure you can come up with something. Hell, if it's good enough who knows what I'll give you.

k... elaborate more on what you want from me.. ?? like wat kinda april fools thing... gimme some more idea's!!! as for some origanal jesus art work.. i will keep my eyes open... heh.

-dexter
you cannot escape your destiny

Ideas?? Let's see, you could go into a religious chat room and convince people that you're one of them. Then tell them you know of a fun site they might enjoy going to and send them to JesusDressUp.com. Then act surprised that they are so insulted and then just wing it from there. Save the files and send them to me. That's one idea....

Maybe you could email a God loving relative (say your grandma) the site and break up your entire family with your twisted sacrilegious ways. Then send me the corresponding emails for me to exploit on my site. That would be funny. I know you can do it, you're a bright kid with the whole world at your beck and call. Make it happen, you'll be glad you did.

Bob

alright, i already screwed up the family thing... i forgot to save it!! but i might have sdomethin taht happend today! i will upload it in both .log and .txt

i also had one other question... did u write the HTML/java for jesusdress up?? casue it is really kool :-D
later

-dexter
you cannot escape your destiny


woops! forgot one thing!!! this is the wrong convoo... and it has a buncha html that i am too lazy to take out it is this crazy kid talking... heh appearently i am not the person he thought iw as...
you cannot escape your destiny


hey, these are the koolest pix of this one really kool kid i know! his name is steven, and DAMN is he hip!

These original pictures were sent to me about 500 times this size.

i did a little GIMP work to one of them, the star jsut reflects the sheer beaty of his face. and i have one were he is getting ready to give it to his dog up the ass, disguesting... maybe a little, but hey! its steve!!!
he is the next door neighbor to my friend shane

-dexter
you cannot escape your destiny

Alright, you win.
And I sent him the Hollywood Jesus Dress Up password.

right on man, alright, now for my next request... whipped cream bikini password... i am willing to stalk 'the beast'(they guy in the picture) for a wile and get loads of funny pix!!!also... i know of people that are equally ugly! i will send you in some of 'my work' so u can judge.

-dexter
you cannot escape your destiny

Please people, do not ask me for the Whipped Cream Bikini password.
I wil not give it out. Business, ya know.

Hey, I really like the site. I read through the part of "God Ate My Balls," well I don't have balls, but I agree with everything your saying.

For the past few years I haven't believed in god, when I was little I was told by a preacher that "God" loved all his children, young and old, and he created all that we see. Bullshit! If he did, he wouldn't have created so much hate, he wouldn't have created the rare disease that my grandma died of at the age of 57, which is still pretty young. And those that do believe in the Bible HATE people that don't believe in "God." For example, I had the shit beat out of me last year in a school bathroom because in class we had to do a report on "God" (which it's against the law to do that kind of thing in class) and I said I had nothing to say, because unless "He" stands in front of my face and has proof of who he is, then to me, there is no existence of his being. I ended up flunking that class, and expelled. And if "He" banishes people to hell, then where is the love? "He" should be forgiving, and love us all.

Now at the age of 17, I'm being ridiculed everyday of my life because of my religious beliefs, or not beliefs I should say. But I just wanted say how much I like that article, it gives me hope that I'm not alone in a world full of freaks that's not like me. But on the subject of death, I'll use the words of one of my favorite bands, Slipknot, "Death is fine, Give me mine!"

Amy