Hate Mail

Testing the gods.
...and one last threat before 2009!
The Jane Rollag files

Her letters are in yellow, whilst mine are in black & white.

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james vigilante christian
Hey Bob,
watch urself if i see you not only will i stare you down, but you might get claped at for ur B.S.. Jesus Rocks and atheists are going to have the chance to quit their shit or face the bullet, soldier dont allow this kind of crap.

The history of our world proves that without a doubt alot of things in the bible happened out side of Christian texts, so when the word has reached all four corners the goats will be seperated from the sheep, and then well see the devil and there followers go to hell and the blessed of the father go to heaven.

I will be puttin an end to sacrilige and extreme blaspheme in this year, many like you will have much to fear, this B.S. that athiest have gotten away with is going to be severly punished. so dont take this lightly..The humble will be Exalted, and the Exalted will be humbled! you are in my prayers!

James 4 Jesus
Edmonton Alberta, Canada

normal bob smith fighting

This is fantastic! I didn't believe it would happen. I didn't think anyone would be able to squeeze one in before midnight, but you people made it happen! One last threat before 2009!! Of course it's a Canadian threat, which as we all know is about a third the threat of a regular one, but don't think it's not appreciated any less. Consider yourself exalted!

And Happy New Year!

“ask Him to speak to you or reveal himself to you. Watch and listen.”

Subject: Your graphics are amazing

Dear Bob,
i happened upon your website while looking for something for my daughter to do. We were looking for dress up websites. That is when we came across your normlbobsmith website.

I am shocked and surprised by your graphics. But i am guessing that is your point. You must like the shock factor.

I am only going to guess that you lack understanding of what the cross represents. With out it you would be lost without hope for all of eternity. He didn't get killed, or caught...he willingly laid his life down. Out of love for you, he sacrificed himself for your sake. He isn't surprised by your mocking spirit. He was mocked at the cross, spit on, beaten and was totally unrecognizable as a human being. Yet He loves you still and is waiting for you. He is the only God who laid his life down for the ones he loves. You will not find any god in this world who was willing to do that.

In the old testament there were 144 prophetic prophesies. Jesus fufilled every one while on earth. He is real and cares for you very much.

You must not believe in Him.

Do this one thing....ask Him if He is real. Just ask. And then ask Him to speak to you or reveal himself to you. Watch and listen.

Jane Rollag

Hello Jane, and thank you for your email. I completely appreciate your compliments, but I'm guessing by your letter that you lack any understanding about the history of gods us humans have invented and the degree to which we believed them to be real despite any sort of evidence, and often, logic. We've designed gods like Zeus, Ra, Thor & Venus who've looked over us thousands of years ago, before Jesus and the Catholic "God" were ever even thought up. And all around the world people have dreamed up their own gods, from Vishnu to Allah, and even new gods like Sathyia Sai Baba, David Koresh, Marshal Applewhite and John Frum. Each one with their own incredible story, and each without a shred of proof to substantiate anything, just like your Jesus Christ. The list of gods goes on and on and on.

Some of those gods have laid down their lives for you, Jane! Others have fought great battles , while some, Jane, have sacrificed their entire life on Earth so that you could fly with them up into paradise forever, and still others have flown up to paradise ahead of us on a magical pair of wings so they'd be there to welcome you when you arrive. So many magical, loving gods begging for you to believe in them! All with hundreds, thousands, some even millions of believers promising that theirs is definitely, most certainly, absolutely, positively the one and only true super-god of the universe.

There are approximately 4,000 different gods and messiahs with written words assuring us they are real and true.
Jane, I beg you, please do one thing for me. Ask each one of them if they are real and to reveal him/herself to you, one after the other. After each request watch and listen then put a checkmark next to each name when something different happens - Of course you can interpret each signal however you want. When you're through, please forward me your list of checkmarks so I can do the same. It'll take some time, but between us both I'm sure we can narrow down this list and figure out which ones are the true gods and which ones are fake using independent interpretation of ambiguous happenstances and everyday occurrences.

Let's get the ball rolling on this, all right? I'm really anxious to find out who's real!!!

Impatiently anticipating your list,

PS. btw, if you're gonna bail on this project and just believe in whoever you started with in the first place, please let me know ASAP so I'm not checking my email every 10 minutes for your list.

“You obviously know that I will not go through 4,000 false gods and test them. What a waste of time.”

I can appreciate where you are coming from. Cynical and heart hardened. You obviously know that I will not go through 4,000 false gods and test them. What a waste of time. If I didn't already believe wholeheartedly in the holy Trinity I never would have been offended by your graphic in the first place. Thus my email to you. God the Father has been around before the earth was formed, so Jesus is no newcomer!

Were you brought up Catholic? I was.
Did I stay Catholic? No. Why? Because I was seeking truth and all I found was many people walking around doing and saying things that they really didn't believe or understand.

Do I want to debate you? No, because Bob, the gospel says I needn't defend it. It will defend itself. God's word will defend itself. He gave us free will. You obviously know that, look at all your choices.

Jane Rollag

Logically examining the evidence to be sure not to pick the wrong god is cynical and heart hardened? I don't think so, Jane. And here I went and already started my check-mark list assuming you'd keep your end of the bargain! I was up all night using YOUR method of examination that YOU instructed me to use, and now you're telling me NOT to test the others the same way? Jane, don't you think we're expected to use the logic & commonsense that one of these gods gave us? You probably don't even care about my test results. But you know what? I'm gonna tell them to you anyhow!

So I divided each of them up into 4 different categories, 1 being least chance of the god being real, 4 being the best. Here's how I measured the results 1-4 after each prayer:
1. No sign or signal of any sort resulting from prayer to particular messiah/deity.
Conclusion: nonexistent, make-believe messiah/deity. Remove from list.

2. Possible sign or signal following prayer, such as beeping car horn outside, ear itch, slight breeze from window, etc.
Conclusion: Possible existence. Continue testing.

3. Good sign or signal such as Bible/Koran/Zendik magazine falling from bookshelf, severe lightning storm, telephone call from dead relative, etc.
Conclusion: Probably exists, continue testing, move particular messiah/deity at top of list!

4. Definite sign or signal such as specific god on my doorstep ringing doorbell, angel messenger dropping from ceiling holding trophy or other great reward, cat reciting scripture, etc.
Conclusion: True God, dispose of list, bow, worship, submit 100% all thoughts and actions without question forever.

Out of the 4,000 separate prayers: 3,867 of them were category 1! I know, right?
Category 2 there were 127, (due to the abundance of weak results I also included birds chirping, a lucky penny seeming to appear from nowhere on floor, and sneeze attacks).
Category 3 had 6!!!! These were all quite exciting (although after 4,000 prayers having my leg fall asleep was exciting).
And guess how many made category 4, Jane. Did you do the math? Yep. you guessed it. ZIP! Zero! Goose egg!

I know what you're saying now, "Which category did Jesus make?"
Jane, let's just say if Jesus were a racehorse and you'd bet your life savings on him, you'd be leaping off the roof of the Stock Exchange right about now. Sorry.

So now you're probably wondering which messiah/deity had the best results? Are you ready for this, Jane? You probably already guessed it, but I'l tell you anyhow. Tupa, the Supreme God of all Creation who lives in the sun. Yep, the South Americans seem to have gotten it right!
When I said my prayer to Tupa the phone rang and a girl on the other end asked to speak to "Tim." Now I don't know a Tim, so I said "I think you have the wrong number" and she said "Oh, sorry." Then, just as she was about to hang up I shouted "WAIT! WAIT! Were you sent by the Supreme God Tupa to signal me of his existence!?!?!?" She said "What?" And we were mysteriously disconnected... I'm assuming by Tupa's enemy, Tau, the spirit of evil, who I blame for making me hang up the phone before she could respond.

So there you have it. It's probably Tupa. But I'm guessing you don't even care about your test method now, huh? It doesn't count when it proves someone other than your god, huh?

Clearly you do not want to debate, and you don't have to. Tupa gave you free will to choose to look no further. And beware! Tau is the master of disguise, so you might want to take another peak under the mask of that "Jesus" guy who tells you not to examine any other gods, especially Tupa!

Praise be to Mighty Tupa who lives in the Sun!

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All opinions, writings, illustrations & designs are that of Normal Bob Smith (C) 2000 - 2011
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