Hate Mail

Attack of the 6th Graders!
Yes, even people as young as SIXTH GRADERS have to rebel against you!”

Their letters are in yellow, whilst mine are in black & white.

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Fan Mail and a Question

First, of course, I want to say that you are a very funny comedian, talented artist and quite clearly an intelligent person. I am glad to have found your website and will be laughing at those hate mail responses for a long time. I'd also like to mention that you're Amazing Strangers series(? I guess that's what you would call it.) is a gem of it's own, particularly those as odd as the 'Peepers.'
Now to that question.

As I've read through hate mail, looked at the Sheeples comics and in that and other places read about your beliefs, I've found myself thinking about my own a little bit. I am an Atheist, and happily so, but I am also quite young. I believe you, without looking back to check, were around 30 when you shed your theistic beliefs, but I changed my mind around 13, I believe. And since 11 or so I had been calling myself agnostic, but my reasons were basically atheistic in nature. I always attributed all that to my Christian-but-not-very-religious parents and having one of those parents a medical researcher. So, feel free to comment on that, and reasons for early changes or what not, but my primary question I mean to get across is this: Do you think that an early belief in atheism could be detrimental in that it may be more emotionally founded and defended, and that more experience may be needed to fully comprehend the reasoning and logic behind a lack of theism?

I am, like you I guess, one who is happy to be challenged to defend my beliefs, but I find myself almost succumbing to some arguments. For example, an argument forwarded by C.S. Lewis, I believe, centered around the thought that no God means no primary moral judgment. I understand that this is a silly thing to think true, and I know that feelings of morality can be derived from evolution, or from simple sociology, but I find it hard to argue this, and sometimes comprehend how such a system could arise. I'm not even sure I always understand the workings of evolution.
I guess I'm mostly just looking for some smart words from an intelligent and funny person, something to help me sort things out and think things through, if just a few words.

Thanks for your time.
Orion Fisher
(I'd send a picture, but I lack a camera, and a photogenic face.)

See, to me this is so basic. Does there have to be someone somewhere with the list of answers for the correct answer to exist?

If you're in a teacherless classroom is the answer to 2 + 2 a mystery, or debatable, or lost in nothingness? Or is the answer still 4, only it's the classroom that has to figure it out on its own and grade itself?

I think a perfect example for this debate is the difference between a courtroom with a single judge or one with a jury. And in the case of mankind's morals, since there is no judge of the universe we must as a society judge ourselves, just as we've been doing for centuries around the world. Mistakes will be made and our grasp of what's right & wrong, humane & inhumane will evolve over time, but it's something we're figuring out by ourselves, often despite the Bible's or "God's" instructions.

Believers think they win the argument because we as humans have failed at making perfect laws or upholding them, thus rendering life unfair if there is no preliminary judge. "So the person who kills and never gets caught gets away with it?" or "What about every lie you've told that's never discovered, where's the punishment for every single one of those if there is no ultimate judge in the sky?" and "If you can get away with these things why not just murder your neighbor and steal all his belongings and rape every person you're the least bit attracted to because there's ultimately no repercussions?" The shortsightedness and pinhole logic in these statements is obvious to anyone who's lived a little life.

Reciprocation has a great bearing on our individual morals. The desire to be treated nicely plays a tremendous role in treating others nicely. I don't kick down my roommate's door and take her belongings because I wouldn't want her to do the same to me. Also I don't do it because I enjoy her company so I'd even go so far as to protect her things so that I can continue to keep her company. And society works much the same way and what's right and what's wrong develops in much the same way no matter where you live, or the religion that rules it.

Let me know if I answered your question. To me it's so obvious that it humiliates the opposing argument.
Thanks for the email!

Yes, even people as young as SIXTH GRADERS have to rebel against you!”

Hi, Bob.
Wow, you really do look ignorant and immature. Here you are wasting your time on the computer droning on about you not believing in God and how christians are brainwashed. Of course, you only made this website to piss off the theists and get some attention. And I love how you just adore your hate mail, that definitely puts the cherry on the cake. But on a serious note, you have no effect on the people. No matter what you say or how you make fun of our beliefs we will still believe in God. And to tell you the truth, you made my love for God much stronger. Seeing how hateful, cocky, and stupid atheists are I realize I don't want to ever been in your position. I mean, look at the atheists you show wearing your clothing. You're definitely putting a stereotype on all atheists, poor them.

Anyway, before I say goodbye I just want to make one thing clear to you. I am a sixth grader in middle school who recently got saved and heard about this site from a friend (she also emailed you). Yes, even people as young as SIXTH GRADERS have to rebel against you to make you open your eyes and see how much of an idiot you are. And I can say myself, that you are certainly, more childish than I.

Another bible-thumping holyroller.
Kelsea Johnson

Christ. I suppose I always knew this day would come. The day when I'm sitting here slump-shouldered arguing with 6th graders about how being in junior high is a fact you shouldn't include on your resume, and there's a reason 14 year olds can't get diver's licenses.

Now Britney, let's say I needed to rate the Bratz dolls or the cutest Jonas Brother, or I had a plate of M&M's I needed emptied, THEN a classroom of 6th graders would be at the top of my go to list!

But, sadly, as history has shown again and again, when a group of sixth graders are rounded up and assigned the task of solving one of life's mysteries one of them usually ends up chasing a ball into the street and getting hit by a garbage truck, and the rest flee the experiment.

My advice to you and the rest of the prepubescents of the world - Fight for your right to vote, because your opinion matters! And if us adults resist, REBEL! Because there is strength in your numbers... unless you're grounded that day.



“You laugh at other people, but I'll let you in on a little secret: your the one they should be laughing at.”

I'm really sorry that you feel the way you do about your life and your disbelief in God. Most of all, I am sorry that you find it necessary to make yourself feel better by laughing at the thought that God could exist.

You laugh at other people, but I'll let you in on a little secret: your the one they should be laughing at. I am sorry that your pathetic life didn't go as planned, but why should you spend so much time investing in the destruction of someone elses life.

I agree, people hang onto the idea of God, as if they can actually be saved, and go to candyland when they die, it is sort of sad.

However, you are the one with problems my friend, as you are the one trying to diminish someone elses faith...for humor. It is obviously something more than humor that you get out of all of this though, isn't it?

Your the internally ugly friend that needs to have externally ugly friends...to make yourself feel better about what a piece of shit you are. I don't hope you burn in hell, only that you get what you deserve...whatever that may be.

I don't want you to believe in God, but please...find something productive to do with your time. You need to go on a spiritual journey, and find the inner you. Because right now, you are dead.

Bethann Wagner

Wow. Have we met? It's like you've known me for years. Are you one of the other parents from little league soccer? Are you Jimmy's mom?

Maybe we could discuss this further over coffee sometime? I'm really much nicer in person.



“...there are BDSM-outfits offered to dress him up with. At this point my sense of humor ends.”

Hello there!

The reason I am writing this mail to you is a website I found today. It's called "Jesus Dress Up".

On this page users can, as the name tells, dress up Jesus, our saviour and God. Among others there are BDSM-outfits offered to dress him up with.

At this point my sense of humor ends. Especially the text written under this "game" is just a bash into the face of anyone who believes in Christ.

I absolutely can not understand for what reason you insult Jesus himself as well as the whole Christianity by writing these sentences.

Please answer me just these two questions: What do you believe would be the reactions of a muslim seeing a game called "Mohammed Dress Up"?

And second question: Why do you kick the religious feelings of Christians right in the ass?

I hope you will answer my questions. Jesus who is full of mercy bless you.


Florian Pletscher

I am more than happy to answer your two questions.

Question #1 What do you believe would be the reactions of a muslim seeing a game called "Mohammed Dress Up"?
I believe the reaction a Muslim would have to, let's say for instance, a "muhammaddressup.com" would be a complaint letter containing lots of imaginative name calling, like" "YOU DIRTY, CRAZY MONKEY!" and "Dog of the devil! You are now the enemy of god and the prophet of islam!" and those sorts of things. They would probably also contain empty threats (which are extremely common on the internet) like: "I hope you have millions of 9/11!!!!" and "We will cut your heads, guilty amerikans! PRAISE BE TO ALLAH!" and that sort of thing.

There would also probably be reactions from other Muslims telling me of their prophet's truth, begging me to believe and bow to Allah or I will suffer in Hell. They would urge me to read the Holy Koran with an open mind so I could educate myself of the suffering that awaits those who don't believe he is God.
But mostly in response to this hypothetical "Muhammad Dress Up" game I'd assume lots and lots of wordy, preachy letters that are easily deleted with the simple click of a button located directly under my right pinky finger.

Frankly, I think there'd be little difference between the reactions from Muslims and the reactions from Christians; Complaining, name calling, threats, begging, anger, rage and long humorless rants about the book they think God wrote. Very little difference at all.

Question #2 Why do you kick the religious feelings of Christians right in the ass?
Because I feel their beliefs are incorrect and harmful to the individual as well as society at large.

I hope I've answered each of your questions satisfactorily.
Thank you for the email.

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